"It appears that this is the time of the week on which we usually see some News and Updates, is it not?"

"Correct as usual, King Friday."

"Upon my soul, I believe the thirteenth of the month has fallen upon a Friday."

"Correct as usual, King Friday XIII... hey, wait..."

Here's all the latest, from the sublime to the ridiculous.

1. Music and Such

        
• If you're going to be in the Chicago area on December 18, then you'll want to come to Christmas on the Town, our church's annual Christmas concert. Our church is fortunate to have no shortage of good quality musicians, so it's always a treat. I'm working on a new choral arrangement of "Away in a Manger" (the Kirkpatrick tune--the English one that actually sounds pretty), and Carrie is sure to make an appearance as well. For more information, check out this link to the church website (which, by the way, is extremely cool for a church website).
        
• "The Pilgrim's Progress" is progressing. This week it's a flashy solo for the brazen temptress Madam Bubble....
        
• The new CD project is coming along. I'm trying to get with one of my graphic designer friends for his ideas on the cover, and I still need a good title...  any ideas? Anybody?

2. Unsystematic Theology

        
• As my friend Greg once put it (about something else), to some, this will mean nothing. To others, this will mean everything. My own attempts at out-of-the-box thinking are nothing compared to one of my favorite professors from Moody, Dr. Michael McDuffee, who exists in the unbearably colorful space between theology and poetry. Our class would hang on every word of his lectures, even though we rarely understood them. Saints, I just found out that he has a blog. It will leave your head spinning and your heart singing. Go.

3. Live from Muppet Labs!        

• Language Log reports the stranger-than-fiction case of a high school principal who made a rule forbidding students from using a certain four-letter word. The odd thing is, the word in question was (cover your eyes, kids!) "meep." This being Language Log, they offer phonological analysis of the vocalizations of Beaker and Road Runner, and the astute observation of  "the dire possibility that young meepers may move on to harder stuff, like bork or manamana."

4. Link Love       

• One of my posts on Spiritual Abuse was favored with a link from Quivering Daughters, a thoughtful and sensitive blog focusing on the spiritual issues of women in (or recovering from) the "Quiverfull Movement." If you haven't heard of it, this is a disheartening form of spiritual abuse masquerading as conservative family values. If you have heard of it, head over that way for some encouragement.

5. Actually, I'm not requesting a cheeseburger; catfood will do nicely, thanks.       

• Because it's Friday and we could all use some levity, check out my latest discovery: Average Cats.  You've seen LOLcats, but these cats have a knack for taking things literally in a way that's devastatingly hilarious. A sample:

And that wraps it up for this week. Have a good weekend!

Leave your own comments: What would you like me to post about next?

Visit ericpazdziora.com for all the latest news, updates, and literal cats.

Background: My brother, knowing my love for all things hymnology, got me a volume of the Letters of John Newton for my birthday this year. It's less about the origin of hymns such as "Amazing Grace" and more about the amazing grace that made up a part of his day-to-day thought and discussion.

In this particular letter, Mr. Newton addresses a question from a friend, Rev. Joshua Symonds, about the idea of "degrees in glory." In other words, is it true that those who do more good works in this lifetime will receive greater honor in heaven? Newton's response is especially encouraging in the light of some of my recent research into spiritual abuse, where so much depends on your performance. But Amazing Grace isn't just for getting saved with.

February 17, 1769

Dear sir,

I cannot agree with your friends, or with Witsius, respecting the degrees in glory. Perhaps we are not capable of stating the question properly in this dark world. I see no force in the argument drawn from 1 Corinthians 15:40-41; or rather, that does not appear to me the sense of the passage, or that the apostle had any respect to degrees of glory. The text in Matthew 19:28 may be compared with Revelation 3:21. However, admitting such degrees, perhaps they will not be distributed (according to human expectation) to such as have been most employed in active life, Matthew 10:41. As wickedness is rated by the judgment of God, not according to the number of outward acts, but by what the heart would do had opportunity offered, Matthew 5:28; so the Lord will graciously accept the desires of his people, and they shall in no wise lose their reward because his providence has appointed them a narrower sphere.

One man, like Mr. Whitefield, is raised up to preach the gospel with success through a considerable part of the earth. Another is called to the humbler service of sweeping the streets, or cleaning this great minister's shoes. Now if the latter is thankful and content in his poor station--if he can look without envy, yes, with much love on the man that is honored--if he can rejoice in the good that is done, or pray for the success of those whom the Lord sends—I see not why he may not be as great a man in the sight of God as he who is followed and admired by thousands.

Upon a supposition of degrees of glory, I should think it probable, the best Christian will have the highest place; and I am inclined to think that if you and I were to travel in search of the best Christian in the land, or were qualified to distinguish who deserved the title, it is more than two to one we would not find the person in a pulpit, or any public office of life. Perhaps some old woman at her wheel, or some bed-ridden person, hidden from the knowledge of the world, in a mud-walled cottage, would strike our attention more than any of the doctors or reverends with whom we are acquainted. Let us not measure men, much less ourselves, by gifts or services. One grain of grace is worth abundance of gifts. To be self-abased, to be filled with a spirit of love, and peace, and gentleness; to be dead to the world; to have the heart deeply affected with a sense of the glory and grace of Jesus; to have our will bowed to the will of God; these are the great things, more valuable, if compared in the balance of the sanctuary, than to be an instrument of converting a province or a nation. See 1 Cor. 13:1-3.

In a word, I should think, from Luke 7:47, that those who love most will be most happy; that those who have most forgiven will love most. And as, in the present life, every believer thinks himself a peculiar instance of God's mercy, and sees his sins in a peculiar light of aggravation, I apprehend it to be so hereafter. The sin of nature is equal in all; and so I think would actual sin be likewise, but for the differences made by the restraining grace and providence of God. He is not perhaps, in the sight of God, the greatest sinner, who has committed the most notorious acts of sin in the sight of man. We would not judge one wolf to be fiercer than another, because he had opportunity of devouring more sheep. Any other wolf would have done the same in the same circumstances. So in sin; so (think I) in grace. The Lord's people, every one of them, would be glad to do him as much service, and to yield him as much honour, as any of the number have attained to. But He divides severally, to one sixty, to one thirty, to one a hundred as he pleases; but they are all accepted in the same righteousness; equally united to Jesus; and, as to the good works on which a supposed difference is afterwards to be founded, I apprehend those that have most will gladly do by them as Paul did by his legal righteousness,-- count them loss and dung for the excellency of Jesus Christ, the Lord. Matthew 25:37.

But it may be said, Is nothing, then, to be expected for so many trials and sufferings, as some ministers are called to for the sake of the gospel? In my judgment, he who does not find a reward in being enlivened, supported, and enabled by the Holy Spirit in the work of the gospel; who does not think that to have multiplied labours owned to the conversion even of a few souls is a great reward; who does not account the ministry of the gospel, with grace to be faithful in the discharge of it, a reward and honour in itself sufficient to over-balance all the difficulties it may expose him to; whoever, I say, does not thus think of the service of Jesus in the gospel, has some reason to question his right to the lowest degree of glory, or, at least, has little right to look for eminence in glory, even though he should preach with as much power and acceptance, and in the midst of as many hardships, as St. Paul did.

...

I am, yours, etc.

Visit ericpazdziora.com for all the latest news, updates, and quotes from 18th-century hymnwriters.

If you've followed my blogging (here or elsewhere), you'll have noticed that I have a weakness for poking fun at bad kitschy "art" that's created in the name of Christianity. (The Christian Album Covers gallery being a prime example.) I also sometimes like to point out how atheist attacks on Christianity tend to miss the point (see Bugaboos). And I've mentioned a time or two my belief that most things in life tend to balance themselves out one way or another.

So I suppose I should have seen it coming. I didn't. I saw it the other day in an article on Scriptorium Daily (one of very few places on the Web where you can get substantive little historical theological studies in your blogroll). Author John Mark Reynolds gleefully points out that--you guessed it--there's plenty of bad kitschy "art" created in the name of atheism. Excerpt:

Whenever I feel too bad about such strange Christian “products,” I visit the web sites of the new Internet atheists.... It is perfectly possible to load up on atheist swag and the graphic quality of t-shirts there actually makes one long for the comparatively excellent stuff one can get in the local Christian book store. Only infidel tees can make you feel better about the dreadful “This Bloods For You” top.  (Read more.)

This I had to see to believe. A few minutes with Google confirmed it. Oh, man, did it ever confirm it. Anything you can think of in kitschy Christian art has its equivalent in kitschy atheist art. Would you believe...

The Happy Throw Pillow!

The Patriotic Yellow Tote Bag!

The Huggable Plush Propaganda Buddy! (Awwww!)

The Tacky T-Shirts!

The Tacky T-Shirts With Cheap Knock-offs of Formerly Trendy Slogans!

The Tacky T-shirts With Silly Attempts at Worn-out Slang!

The Tacky T-Shirts in a Disturbing Unintended Juxtaposition!

(OK, a cheap shot I admit, but still-- really?)

A Cheesy Album Cover—wait, an album cover?!

That’s right, an album cover. This one deserves a little extra attention. As highlighted sarcastically in Reynolds’ article, prominent atheist activist (and former preacher) Dan Barker has composed, performed, and recorded a series of atheist-themed songs, now available on CD. I promise I’m not making this up. You can see the album and listen to excerpts at this link from the Freedom From Religion Foundation.

How good is the atheist album? It’s everything you could dream of and more, if you’re a connoisseur of truly staggeringly awful art. You know the kind of thing I mean—no, not that current teen-pop idol with all the screaming fangirls. Not even the amateur praise band at Community Church of X overplaying a Vineyard song. Set your sights lower. Think back to Mystery Science Theater 3000 and “The Annoying Music Show.” Think Plan 9 From Outer Space. Manos, The Hands of Fate. The poetry of William Topaz McGonagall. Japanese pop stars covering Coldplay. William Shatner singing the Beatles. Doctors rapping about sickle-cell anemia. (No, really.)

Describing the sound of this debacle—the cheap electronic keyboard, the digital drumbeats, the too-earnest crooning—is all but impossible. A track title should give you the flavor in four words: “Stay Away Pope Polka.” My other favorites are the title track (think a rather creepy take on Mr. Rogers), “Love” (you only think you know about schmaltz), and “No Hurry to Die” (which, as Reynolds observed, may have you rethinking your position on that). Somebody call Jim Nayder.

As a Christian I certainly don’t mind anyone expressing what they believe or disbelieve in, but as a musician I just have to shake my head and laugh. I guess these “New Atheists” have a lot more in common with the Old Fundamentalists than they may care to admit.

Still, you have to give them a little credit: it's got to be hard to write a song about how good it is not to believe in something you don't think is real. Christians, on the other hand, have been known to make art this bad in worship to the Creator. And we even have Bach, Mendelssohn, and Handel to look up to. Hmm.

On the other hand, maybe the lesson to take away here is simply that a taste for producing, marketing, and consuming awful art is endemic to our society, regardless of faith or creed. I think that's called "the fallen state of man." God and/or Reason help us all.